First edit: 12/1/24. Most recent edit: 16/1/24
In 2023 we were contacted by a person who confessed they had experienced an acute psychosis in 2020 attributed to them being undiagnosed Bipolar type 1. In subsequent years however, their disorder escalated, despite them strictly adhering to psychiatrically prescribed medication. They turned to the Moondisorder Institute for help. We gathered evidence on this participant enough to argue that this experience, what medical professionals referred to as psychosis, is in fact far more than what it seems. We reached out to interview five other people who fit the criteria for experiencing strange phenomena. They will be referred to as B1, C1, D1, E1 and F1. I urge you to put aside scepticism and simply enjoy the information in this document for what it is, a guidebook for the unknown.
Some terminology must be established. It may be considered the components of storytelling ‘lore’ experienced by each witness of this supernatural event.
The participant is the human experiencing the sensation named below called The Fluffy. There are a few mythical figures that they may draw comparison to. They may be considered somewhat of a modern day ‘oracle’, as this is the most suitable word to carry the connotation of being someone whom a higher force or entity speaks through. They also may be considered ‘witches’ for experiencing the type of ‘spells’ we will discuss. The participant can be anyone whose spiritual psyche has been broken down and rebuilt through the process we will explain in the following chapters. All five participants involved in this study were all situated in Adelaide, Australia, and we are led to believe that the city of Adelaide may hold importance to whatever the Entity may have in plan.
The entity, otherwise considered the higher force or ‘God’, is what causes The Fluffy. It may be simplistic to give it a label of capital-G God, because it shouldn’t be confused with any existing concepts of God such as in Christianity. We do not know its alignment or how it wants to be seen or whether it wants to be depicted in artistic forms. Overall, it is playful and good natured as far as we can tell, but may carry dark secrets. It is omniscient, ever-present and most things associated with gods throughout human history -- except more fun.
The Fluffy is when the participant feels they are tethered and connected to an otherworldly, undocumented entity. This sensation is a cross between established concepts of spiritual, supernatural and paranormal, but defies all existing words so it must be simply called ‘The Fluffy’. As it is an ‘entity’ speaking through the participant, this could be considered a modern day type of ‘possession’. Whatever is the truth to the matter, The Fluffy alters the participants perception of reality. This means, they see and feel a different form of reality, and exist in a fairytale world perhaps somewhere between realms. The Fluffy will fluctuate in intensity across the six different Phases currently documented. We can only hypothesise this experience is caused by some sort of ‘higher power’.
The biggest threat to the Participant’s wellbeing is unfortunately, the Normies. These are Everyday people who don’t believe in concepts of the power of The Fluffy. In layman's terms, they are those who don’t believe in spiritual, supernatural or paranormal happenings. They are likely to think the preacher of The Fluffy, the participant, is downright mad. If the participant doesn’t mask their behaviour, the Normies will believe that the participant should be medicated and locked up in a ward. Normies may react with ignorance, denial or even hostility if forced to contemplate whether there is some power orchestrating humanity’s existence. Despite the personal testimonies we have gathered from these five people, Normies continue to be the greatest threat towards greater understanding of this complex phenomena known as The Fluffy.
The first stage is ‘The Breaking’. The participant may be a high functioning individual who prides themselves in their independence, but all that will come crashing down. It began with a wacky mood, a tantalising taste of heaven and ecstasy but would soon become evident that our main participant was what Normies consider to be ‘unwell’. From the inside, this experience had definitely divulged into madness. It was obvious from the lack of control that the participant was beyond a state of conscious behaviour. A lot of screaming occurred, startling the neighbours. C1 was reported having streaked naked down a major highway in their city.
The Fluffy has yet to fully manifest at this stage, but the participant will experience a warped ecstasy that easily is associated with textbook ‘mania’. Some of out participants noted extreme ‘wackiness’ by this stage, feeling exceedingly ‘goofy’. Some even felt their sense of gender identity shapeshifting around this time, and felt a deranged euphoria. In this phase, our participants do not have the lucid control of their facilities that we see develop in later phases.
By the end of The Breaking, the participant will have been in a psychiatric institution for anywhere from 3 weeks to a month. Usually the first administered drug is Olanzapine, a quick acting drug which calms the patient down. After showing signs of mental clarity, such as by not screaming about FBI agents spying on them from the above floors, they will then be moved onto other drugs to suit each individual.
Two participants met each other in the Margaret Tobin Psychiatric Ward at Flinders Medical Centre. When interviewed independently without knowing the other was involved with our study, they both remembered a moment of kindred bonding with another person in the ward, and reported feeling telepathically connected to each other.
All participants reported feeling uncontrollable words pour forth from an unknown source. This babbling becomes apparent in Phase 1 and continues long until Phase 6 although it declines in intensity by then. It is important for the participant to conceal this spiritual speech in the scrawling drawings mentioned below, instead of posing a threat to themselves by seeming odd to Normies.
This is an essential aspect of The Breaking, as the participant must experience a cathartic purging of worldly concepts of their ‘sins’ to some extent. They must forsake some of their most cherished aspects of themselves. In one case, a participant reported a drastic reduction in their art abilities post ‘psychosis’.
Phase 1 is a life altering experience, it leaves all the individuals extremely shattered. Every one of our five participants struggled with crippling Depression in the months after emerging out from the ward. The stigma of being diagnosed ‘bipolar’ also carries a weight. All the individuals reported an inner struggle attempting to piece together all the challenging things they had experienced.
From our documentation, we have learnt that after Phase 1, it is only beginning. As after one year after the first onset, the
After nearly one year, every participant experienced newfound sensations which differed greatly from the outright madness remembered with The Breaking of 2020. This is Phase 2. The early days of psychic/spiritual awakening took hold of the participant with a few distinct sensations. These below indicate the process of ‘The Fluffy’ beginning to sink in. We call the sensation below The Phenomena, as they inexplicably impact the participant in a way that could be considered ‘psychic’ or ‘supernatural’. They all experienced great frustration in verbally trying to convey it to our team. Due to all the Moondisorder Institute’s recorded hours spent with the patients, we have documented some of The Phenomena to the best of our abilities.
When B1 was walking home from school, they felt a sudden sensation of falling into the sky. They felt very disoriented and collapsed in a local park, where passersby worried for their safety.
The participant recounts a sensation of finding it hard to look at their eyes in the mirror, that they felt a feeling of being intensely gawked at, to the extent something was drilling into the back of their brain. It caused them great fear to see their eyes so they avoided it for the rest of Phase 2.
There is a recount of a psychic-like wavelength pulsing over the participant as they walked down a sunny hallway. They screamed out for help, but it was over in an instant. They described it as feeling like some ‘golden wave’ passed through their head, altering their sense of their body, feeling the distinct ‘light and airy’ sensation we later came to associate with The Fluffy. This is yet again proof of crossing over into the domain of The Entity, as the Fluffy begins to take control.
Most of the participants recounted feeling distant from other people, so much so to the extent that they thought they were developing an unknown one-of-a-kind disorder. They reported that it felt like humans around them were simply ‘people shaped cardboard cutouts’. Later, it would be revealed this was simply part of the FLuffy ‘setting in’.
There is a recount of music warbling and ‘glitching’, changing in sound to the participants' ears. This is noted to have been experienced with the songs Forces and Gut’s Theme by Susumu Hirasawa.
The last part of Stage 2 is a dense sensation of a ‘melancholy’ and ‘righteousness’ sitting in the back of the head of the participant. It felt like a cross between a headache and Depression, but they were certain it was something else. According to participant B1, they had felt all of the above sensations. The Dense-Head-Trauma was particularly strong when they had returned home at night from university.
A: Can you tell us what happened, truthfully?
B1: Yeah, not like you’ll believe me tho, anyways. So I reheated some leftover spaghetti, but before I could even take a bite, that feeling in my head, up and left!
A: The Dense-Head-Trauma?
B1: Yes, but that’s a stupid name you could call it anything else. So anyways, I was confused, I had felt this sensation in my head for like, three days, then it suddenly vanished!
A: How did it vanish?
B1: Like a cloud up and drifting away, fwoof! After that, I went to the back of our house and was about to cry myself to sleep, I was utterly exhausted.
All our participants experienced a final possession in the form of ecstatic dancing around their home. They recounted feeling as if a force was surging and pulsing through their body.
Our participants each were compelled to run away from home right at the start of Phase 3. They recounted they felt spurred onwards by this otherworldly sensation, The Fluffy. Each packed a small bag with little but a water bottle, and headed out.
All participants remarked on seeing translucent blue humanoid forms up where the stars should be. The star people are a major part of The Entity’s ‘lore’ that we have yet to unravel. From eyewitness accounts, all The Star People appeared to flip around on pivot point, flailing madly. The participants all felt ‘guided’ around the city of Adelaide.
Apparitions are reported to only appear to the participant through ‘real world’ materials; such as in the shadows, leaves, clouds or in the light. They have also reported to have experienced apparitions in phone screens, such as seeing supposedly still cartoon drawings shapeshifting in motion, but it is less common and less memorable to the participant, so ‘digital apparitions’ tend to be forgotten the quickest. The real world materials however, have taken many forms. Participant D1 reported to have seen fairy-like creatures in the autumn leaves around suburbs of Unley and Goodwood in Adelaide, South Australia.
After being assaulted in a dark park, participant F1 saw a somewhat realistic apparition of monkeys having intercourse sculpted out of the clouds. She felt like it was a vision sent to mock and tease her for her experience, but ultimately laughed at it.
All participants experienced a moment of wandering out in the leafy suburbs of Adelaide. When they looked at the trees, they recalled seeing shadowy monkey-like forms clinging to the branches. They also noted glowing white-faced, rotund and spherical creatures lurking in the shadows, watching as they walked by.
All Participants; B1, C1, D1, E1 and F1, were placed in psychiatric wards for around a fortnight each. The wards ranged from Margaret Tobin at Flinders Medical Centre, to Moira Norlunga and Glenside. Some of our female participants recorded cases of sexual assault during this time, thus it is important for the future to be aware that exposure to The Fluffy makes the host susceptible to being taken advantage of.
Phase 4 appears to end with all the participants returning back to their home, but The Fluffy has yet to integrate with the host. This stage we refer to as The Calming, for the participant will spend a great time healing from their overwhelming experiences. Every participant was shaken, but notably every one of them admitted they felt cathartically ‘purified’ by their experiences, to the extent of having powerful epiphanies about how they wanted to spend the rest of their lives.
In Phase 4, our participants each turned to hobbies to process their chaotic experiences. One made an ambitious scrapbook while another turned to photography, another to programming and another to music. Each reported this stage of their life as being a bit shell shocked. The impact of The Fluffy is still strong at this Phase, and unfortunately, this experience doesn’t always end well.
With the scrapbooking, F1 found meaning through piecing together snippets from their favourite comic, juxtaposed against childhood photos. They claimed that this scrapbook acted like her own Bible, documenting her fable. We found it hard to follow this collaged book, as we didn’t understand the deep importance of the comic Berserk to F1. From F1’s explanation, they felt trauma over losing their virginity and extrapolated much meaning from the ‘Lost Children Arc’ named section of the comic. In this chapter, a bloody battle takes place between a young female antagonist in her monstrous form, and the older male protagonist. Somehow F1 interpreted, through the Fluffy’s influence, that this scene was a metaphor for intercourse. F1 processed how she had felt ‘unlovable’ and ‘old’ for the older age she was when she lost her virginity, to a man who made fun of her. Many notions of being a ‘romantic and sexual failure’ were expressed in F1’s interviews with us.The Fluffy however, as she scrapbooked, wrapped her head in a ‘soft blanket of ecstasy’ as she meaningfully glued-down these images. It is also mysterious that she claimed her actions were perfectly timed to music through her headphones.
‘It was like every move of my hand, every alignment of my paper snippings, were guided with a holy meaning…”
She tied a few colourful embroidery threads into the book, representing her bonds and memories of men she’d loved so far in her young life. ‘Severed but still remaining attached’, she said. After many tears, F1 expressed that she was grateful for The Entity choosing to send these repressed emotions through her. Ultimately, she believed The Entity was helping her process deep rooted trauma through this emotional scrapbook, and was ‘much better than seeing a therapist’. A figure from Lost Children Arc is included on the evidence page.
There is a dark side to The Fluffy, as this experience is not something sustainable in the long run within the World of the Normies. Usually the Phase called The Closing of the Gate will be demarcated with suicidal ideation and even a suicide attempt and hospitalisation. The reason The Entity would do such a thing is unsure, but it may be in order to shake the participant into an awareness of their mortality. Perhaps this is how the Entity exhibits to the Participant that The Fluffy is not a sustainable permanent state of being, but a short lived experience that teaches something. In participant C1’s experience, they overdosed on lithium and ended up in hospital. This experience was horribly traumatic for C1 but they agreed to talk to us about it briefly.
A: Can you tell us why you attempted suicide?
C1: It was the voices, they told me such horrible things-- oh, I can’t even say it.
A: Even just a little?
C1: ...it told me I was a horrible person, that I had all these thoughts, although in reality I know I don’t have those thoughts. It told me I wanted to do...atrocious things. And then, I took a whole jar of lithium -- a whole jar! Downed it all, handfuls of the stuff, and then I---...
A: It’s ok, take your time.
C1: I called an ambulance before, then...I barfed it all back up, so I kinda saved myself in that way. They took me to the emergency ward and jabbed an IV drip in my arm. It was...all really traumatic.
A: I can imagine it would be. Can you tell us anything about what the thoughts you had were like?
C1: It was utterly taboo, hideous things like --- Oh, I just can’t say it.
[C1 begins crying.]
Phase 6 marks the stage in which the Entity has somewhat assimilated into the lives of the participant, and not the other way around. The Fluffy has become far less intense than in the previous 5 Phases and the host has succeeded in hiding any ‘abnormal’ behaviour from the eyes of Normies. As we are still observing the lives of Participants B1,C1,D1, E1 and F1. All five participants are attempting to integrate back into the World of the Normies, some achieving more success than others. Their futures are uncertain, as they are paving a path unknown to us without a tethering to The Entity.
In Phase 6, the Entity will begin to show one of its most distinctive traits, that it is fond of drawing with the participant's hand. Usually the drawings and writing produced range from smiley faces to vulgar or simplistic words such as YES, NO, SEX!. Often it will express enthusiasm towards the participant’s name, saying it ‘loves them’. This scrawl tends to drive the participant around in circles, never quite progressing the conversation in a meaningful way nor exposing the secrets of the universe. The Entity is preoccupied with having fun, and likes to make up words and play games akin to ‘word association’ games but using drawings -- not too unlike Pictionary or the Japanese end-word association ‘Shiritori’ game. This scrawl carries meaning that is hard to express outside the mind of the Participant. It is of utmost importance for the Participant to conceal this cryptic scrawl from Normies, especially family and friends, in order to preserve an appearance that they are not ‘unwell.’
Within Phase 6, participant ‘E1’ recorded the phenomena of their voice changing to a lower, gravelly, unusual pitch when talking. This frightened E1 as it was sinister in tone and they felt like it wasn’t themselves speaking. This may happen when the Entity desires to speak, so it uses the participants' vessel. E1 named the phenomenon ‘The Femto’ because they felt it bore resemblance to the villainous Berserk character, Femto. They are overly attached and constantly extracting meanings from this comic, we noted. To E1, the character Femto is associated with a lack of empathy, and acts as an image that makes this phenomena feel less disturbing and more ‘empowering and relatable’ according to E1. The participants who experience this often feel an ‘emptiness’ and a ‘dark’ sensation, but some have claimed that it is not completely unpleasant, but instead a cathartic release from the daily expectations of enduring a Normie world, not built for their enlightened ways. When The Femto speaks, it speaks from above and below. It may be proof of ‘demonic’ possession, as it bears the qualities of Satanism and/or witches that have become iconic down through the ages. Berserk’s characters have somehow become icons to all the participants, despite them not knowing each other. We interviewed E1:
A: Can you tell us a bit about The Femto?
E1: What is there to know about it? I don’t want
A: Berserk is very important to you and appears to have guided you through all these scary events, when does the Femto speak?
E1: It speaks when triggered, I can’t trigger it now.
A: What sort of triggers?
[E1 slinks down into their seat. Their voice changes.]
E1: Oh, sex. You know. It likes sex, but also doesn’t. It’s pissed it off that it can’t get any.
A: Is this The Femto speaking? Hello Femto.
E1: Don’t play friends with me. I don’t have to listen to you.
A: Why is The Femto triggered around sex?
E1: [E1 Mumbles and makes incoherent mutterings.]
A: Hello, are you ok?
[Our cameraman is then the target of E1’s assault.The film ends there.]
E1 had seemed like a gentle person and we were shocked that they could transform on us like this. From this small amount of information, we extrapolated that The Femto is a character imbued with a strong theme of sexuality. We drew a correlation between it and the concept of the Freudian ‘Id’. This is what Freud believed was a part of all humans which was responsible for primal instincts such as hunger and sex drive. We are reluctant to ‘summon’ The Femto again as our cameraman still has the bruises to prove the assault.
As it remains in the system of the host for the foreseeable future, we can almost draw the modern comparison of this condition to being like long COVID. It is difficult for The Moondisorder Institute to predict how each of these five individuals will endure under The Entity’s control for what appears to be, the rest of their lives, but we have gathered some data on the matter.
When do strange experiences turn into what outsiders refer to as ‘psychosis’ and therefore, a threat to the participant and maybe others? This may be the second they share these experiences with Normies, which sets them aside as someone different, unfortunately. Once they begin to babble about spirits and wondrous things, it is undeniable that Normies around them, especially cherished family or friends, will begin to worry and encircle around the participant. Often they urge them to take more medication and seek professional help in order to become ‘well’ again. Little do they know, the participant is ‘well’, perhaps more so than the Normies themselves are. We have gathered some advice from our five participants.
Enjoyment of ‘spiritual babble’ should be reserved for private, not even to be shared with Normie loved ones, as any expression of unusual behaviour will have you institutionalised.
The notebooks of scrawl are an exceptionally worrisome visual warning to Normies, who don’t comprehend the spiritual significance of such linework. Make sure to hide your scrawl, however, if you are an artist or writer, you may get away with the scrawl as being ‘creative expression’.
As expressed above, Normies will be eagle-eyed in monitoring those who have experienced ‘mental health’, and worry for their wellbeing. We remarked that our participants felt stigmatised and notably unhappier when around Normies, than compared to the happiness and spiritual wellbeing they felt when alone. Unfortunately, Normies drain happiness from our participants and leave them feeling ‘despairing’ and ‘like outcasts’. This was especially the case the closer the bonds to the Normie our participants had. Attempting to survive in a normie world appears to be the greatest challenge to the mental and spiritual stability of our strong individuals.
As mentioned above, it is of utmost importance to remain in control of The Entity, as we are unsure when it may choose to spiral the host’s life out of control again. It appears The Entity prides itself on it’s intimate connection to the host vessel, and wishes for the host to remain stoically in charge of their own life. Even when institutionalised, the participant is still challenged as they will encounter other people who preach their mental health escapades. They may connect with other seemingly like minded individuals over social media, but they are not to be fooled!---These individuals most likely have not experienced The Fluffy and The Entity but rather, drug induced psychosis and mental breakdowns. If the participant spends too much time around them, they may fall into unsavoury circles of people who do drugs and binge drink. It is important for the participant to remember their experiences through writing, vlogging or art, especially if just for themselves, and to maintain a strong sense of identity. They will be challenged by all the people around them, those to claim to have experienced the unknown, or not.
It isn’t all negative, as this connection to The Entity correlates with higher creativity and lateral thinking. The participants report feeling especially proud of seeing science fiction and fantasy stories on TV, as if they personally see their fable represented in the fictitious stories. The sense of grandiosity and ‘mattering’ that individuals reported has led all of them to believe there is some sense of an ‘immortal soul’ and ‘life after death’.
This is a theory founded by participant F1 that the Entity wants a physical vessel, a concept represented by the romantic pairing of the two fictional male characters from the manga Berserk; Griffith and Guts. It is a theory that is hard to prove as it is only understood by the experiencers of The Fluffy. We interviewed F1 on this theory and their hopes for the future:
A: How do you think you’ll cope with this experience?
F1: It’s because it's just a part of me, ya know? Like an imaginary friend that just resurfaces when you want it to...but that makes me sound insane…
A: We know you’re not insane. You’re safe here.
F1: Thanks...this thing…it isn’t evil. It just wants to be loved, that’s all. I have this theory, ya know, that it wants a vessel to coexist in. It just wants to understand what it means to be human. It’s like what Guts means to Griffith, have you ever read Berserk?
A: No, I’m afraid I don’t know what that is.
F1: It changed my life, I don’t know how but,...I think it was meant to guide me through all this...
For the sake of science, we concealed the details of each participant from one another but mentioned to each of them that there were others enduring the same condition. This may have a positive effect of conveying the idea that the individual is not alone, and ease the burden of being someone under the influence of The Entity. Although the future seems frightening and uncertain in the face of the unknown, it appears empirically proven that their spirituality and sense of wellbeing has been enriched for each participant.
For inquiries about our research, contact the The Moondisorder Insitute.